Category Archives: humor
“Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.” Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC.
Former President George W. Bush has been rather quiet since he left office over eight months ago. A speech in Canada and a few trips to sporting events have been the extent of his public activity.
Last week for example, he showed up at the Dallas Cowboys new stadium and was seen on television chatting with NFL icon John Madden. He appeared rejuvenated and enjoying life after an embattled and hard fought presidency.
He has kept with tradition and refrained from criticizing his successor. This is unsurprising, and in keeping with both his respect for tradition and family pedigree. Dick Cheney has been entrusted to fight for Bush Administration policies along with protecting and promoting it’s legacy.
Something doesn’t seem quite right though. His post presidency is a bit too quiet. I have personal memories of newly liberated former presidents( not to mention living through 5 partial, or complete post presidencies) and I’ve never seen anything like it. This isn’t my first rodeo.
In fairness, there has been a move to a new crib in Dallas, talk of a forthcoming autobiography, and apparently, a presidential library in the works. However, I still think Bush’s level of inactivity and lack of public appearances seem unusual.
A couple days ago my feelings were confirmed. It turns out George W. Bush didn’t move to Dallas at all. In fact, he’s in Denver, and you will never believe what he is doing here. I’ll let the picture speak for itself.
A bus mechanic! I’m shocked. Apparently his tumultuous presidency drove him to seek a fresh start. A more secluded and simple life is probably attractive after years of dealing with attack dogs in the media. Does this explain it though?
Is it a coincidence that a major player in a terrorist plot was recently apprehended here in the Denver? Maybe he couldn’t get all that “War on Terror” stuff out of his system and decided to take matters into his own hands. Whatever it is, I’m going to get to the bottom of it.
This is breaking news and I would appreciate a link (or at least a hat tip) if you decide to write about this. I just talked to Matt Drudge and he is warming up his siren as we speak. In my humble opinion, this is the biggest story broken by a blogger since the Dan Rather scandal in 2004. If you don’t see new posts it probably means I’m off doing T.V. and radio interviews.
Note: My picture doesn’t do the advertisement justice. His resemblance to W. is striking at a certain distance.
Elizabeth Braddock: “Winston, you are drunk, and what’s more you are disgustingly drunk.”
Winston Churchill: “Bessie, my dear, you are ugly, and what’s more, you are disgustingly ugly. But tomorrow I shall be sober and you will still be disgustingly ugly.”
A 45-year-old woman from Ft. Collins, Co. pleaded guilty to sexual assault on a 16-year-old boy last week.
Richael Michels, 45, will be sentenced in November. After accepting the plea bargain, Judge Dave Williams said Michels faces jail time and will be required to register as a sex offender.
She will actually do some jail time. Imagine that.
The bad scary…
Michels was accused of having sex on multiple occasions with a 16-year-old boy with whom she developed a relationship at a Fort Collins “fur meet,” where furries gather to socialize. Police said Michels’ nickname was “Kitteh.”
WTF is a fur meet? Well I found out. I’ll now give you a pop quiz.
Here are your choices:
A. place you might find Andrew Sullivan
B. place you might find a glorious natural pelt
C. place you might find people who are fans of anthropomorphism
D. place you might find old school beaver trappers selling their wares
The answer is C.
Furries are people who have an appreciation or are fans of anthropomorphism – or humanlike animal characters.
Some dress as animals while others just enjoy the artistic and spiritual aspects of anthropomorphism, according to local furries.
Witnesses told police Michels on multiple occasions kissed the boy intimately at furry gatherings, and on one occasion, a fur meet attendee told police the two engaged in sexual acts, according to an arrest affidavit.
In court Friday, Michels told Williams that she was hospitalized following her July arrest and has been diagnosed as being bipolar.
Michels said she is now taking four prescription medications and is under the care of a psychiatrist and a therapist.
How convenient. I’m sure this will be used in November when she is sentenced to significantly reduce her punishment. I wonder how well this defense would go over if it was a 45-year-old man and a 16-year-old girl? Rhetorical.
The beta provider…
According to the arrest affidavit, police began investigating in part because Michels’ husband told police his wife spent a “significant” amount of time online chatting with people he didn’t know.
I know I’m supposed to take this seriously. I know I’m supposed to condemn our criminal justice system, societal double standards, and most importantly, the child raping oinker. And I do. I want to be clearly on the record on all of that. However, to be quite honest, I am much more interested in the sordid underground world of “furries”.
Roissy and others have said that the only endeavor that doesn’t have groupies is devotees of World of Warcraft. I think this case provides more evidence for that assertion. To be honest, I think a WoW convention would have more going for it than a “furry” gathering. I would be less embarrassed about being seen at the former myself. Barely.
I will say that the furry meeting is probably more fruitful if your goal is picking up middle aged crazy broads at the peak of menopause. The female to male ratio has got to be 10 to 1 right? What kind of guy goes to such a gathering? A little bit teh gey right?
Well I found some, click here to see omegus maximus. Click here for the wiki entry on furry fandom. Looks like I am wrong. Of the pictures I have seen, it looks to be “Star Trek looking” omega males and fat nerd girls. All the pics indicate more males than females as well.
I really hate to pile on the poor 16-year-old, but….well, I’m guessing he isn’t exactly the captain of the football team at his high school. Ditching practice and avoiding the cheerleaders to go to the local “furry” meeting and bang a creepy old harridan doesn’t sound like a plausible scenario.
I bet this old sow really got into the kitty role play with the inexperienced dork. I forgot to include this gem…
Fellow fur meet attendees said Michels sometimes wore cat ears at the gatherings and that they urged her to end the relationship with the boy.
Sexy! Imagine the picture posted above with cat ears on. Much better huh. She goes from a 1 to an 8 just like that. Now that, my friends, is Girl Game. Meow.
This case might demonstrate that ugly people get treated more harshly than the good looking. Most of the hot female child predators don’t face jail time. The fact that these types of cases are becoming more common may result in stiffer penalties though.
Finally, does it surprise anyone that she has been chatting online with people (men) her beta provider didn’t know? I will be curious to see if the hubby kicks this cow to the curb. For this reason I will continue to follow the case. I might have a budding “Beta Of The Month” candidate on my hands.
Update: Commenter Tarl brings this to my attention. It’s worth a look. I now know everything I need to about the “furry” phenomenon. Yikes.
Yes, I’m still sick. No I won’t bore you with details. Not to sick to crawl over to the computer and put together a few odds and ends though.
First, I wanted to link to a post I did in reaction to Ferdinand’s Manifesto. If I had it to do over, I’d tweak a few things, but I still stand by it. Many of the points I make could just as easily apply to the new Mens Issue’s web magazine started by Welmer. I’m really rooting for it to be successful.
I hope The Spearhead becomes one stop shopping for men( and like minded women) of all ages and stations in life, who are concerned with mens issues, both at the micro, and macro level. The nine contributors are all good writers and thinkers. Send some traffic and feedback their way.
A few political notes…
The whole Obama birth certificate “conspiracy” never did anything for me. I think the energy and focus on it has been silly and counter productive.
The fact that he hasn’t shown the press his original certificate does nothing to convince me either. Either something on it is mildly embarrassing, or he understands that it is to his advantage to have “right wingers” foaming at the mouth about a non issue for years on end. Seems like smart, Chicago style politics to me.
However, since before the election, I thought this issue was legitimate and worth pursuing. The evidence that Bill Ayers wrote Dreams From My Father is substantial. I have little doubt that Ayers wrote the book that made so many “conservatives” get weak in the knees for Obama.
On that note, let me plug a piece written by T. Coddington Van Voorhees VII, a real conservative who understands what kind of guy Obama is.
If you haven’t checked out Andrew Breitbart’s new website, I would encourage you to do so. It’s the place that broke the Acorn and NEA scandals. If you believe in the message, I encourage you to link to it.
A post about Maureen Dowd’s recollection of famous American political quotations.